Rowdy Raids the Health Sciences Center

Jennifer Byrd

Editor in chief

Sterile environments and medical procedures are not Rowdy’s idea of a good time. He’d much rather fly by the seat of his pants than sit in a seat, especially if the aforementioned station just so happens to be in a doctor’s or dentist’s office.

This being the case, Rowdy was slightly nervous to attend the Health Sciences Center’s information session. He knew the students wouldn’t try to prick him with sharp objects or anything horrifying like that, but he still felt nauseous entering the building.

Rowdy instantly felt better when he saw his friend, Bonsey Bones the Skeleton. Bones and Rowdy go way back; when Bonsey came on the scene, Rowdy showed the new guy the ropes as any friend would. He taught him how to raid the HSC and gave him a campus tour. They skipped the cafeteria though; Rowdy didn’t think Bonsey had the stomach for it.

Rowdy decided it would be a good idea to get his blood pressure checked even though he was feeling better, so he visited the nursing students. After a complete physical and more sweating than he knew was possible from a bobble-headed mascot, Rowdy was cleared for raiding.

Next on the list was Phlebotomy, but an impromptu change in itinerary found Rowdy in the dental clinic. Mr. Raider is a firm believer in dental hygiene as evident by his brilliant smile. He had a cavity once, and decided the only good thing about it was laughing gas. Rowdy is known to run away like a little boy at bath time when it comes to needles, but luckily his dental exam showed no more fillings were needed.

A visit to the radiology technician and the respiratory therapy students’ demonstrations proved eventful and informative as well. Rowdy now knows he is lucky to have these fine practitioners-in-training to take care of his future medical needs. As a fellow man of service, he respects all the HSC students’ loyalty and dedication.

Most of all, Rowdy is glad he got out of there unscathed. He loves the medical community, but he prefers not to need their services. In his glee, he looked around for a banister to slide down, but alas, the HSC building is but one story. Undaunted, the Master of Raids started launching cotton balls at unsuspecting students using wooden tongue depressors as catapults.

Rowdy then exited the building before getting evicted from yet another campus location. He hopes

Dean Points didn’t see him, but he has a sneaking suspicion that he did.

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